I remember the night I met my husband like it was yesterday, the feeling he gave me, the butterflies in my stomach and the excitement in my heart. We connected and began a relationship I had NO idea would turn into: Marriage.
My mother called me the day after the wedding when I was still on blissful high from all the hype and fun we had on our special day and she said, “Yasmin, it is really important that you understand that now your husband is now your family. He is now your FAMILY and he is also our FAMILY”
What? I was confused.
My family is my parents, siblings and extended family I grew up with my entire life. Now my husband was my family??? How can he be in the same category with people who l loved and loved me unconditionally my entire life?
I took those words very seriously and it grounded my understanding on what ‘husband’ means and most importantly how I valued a marriage relationship. And because FAMILY is #1 in my value system…..
I am no relationship expert but wanted to both share my thoughts after 5 years of being married and invite you to share yours.
- Love is not enough.
- If one person stops growing and evolving as a person it can negatively affect the relationship.
- Define your love and marriage frequently by listening to each other, talk about how you want to love and be loved consistently.
- Never underestimate the power of romance and consistent acts of romance.
- Fully understand how false ideologies on the expectations of marriage and the roles of wife, husband, mother, father can impact your relationship.
Although it is tempting to expand on these ideas, I am still on this journey of learning how to be in this relationship…But knowing my core values as my mother pointed out early on helps me to stay grounded.
5 years is not a long time, but for us we celebrated our anniversary to the max and I feel truly blessed to still be in complete awe of my husband.
Knowing your own values is SUPER important in every relationship, when you experience challenging times they will provide you with answers and guidance back to your true self.
Do you know what your core values are? How does knowing your values affect the help you in creating and maintaining good relationships with others? With yourself?
If you don’t try answering this simple question: Who are you and what is truly important to you?
Your answer should be in alignment with what you value or your system of values.